The Good and the Bad on the Other Side of the Gate
by Cat of the Military
Summary: An FMA Real Life Crossover! In this latest chapter, Ed, Al and Sora run into perverted police an Scar in...Spandex? Plus, Ed learns to speak Switzerlandish! Oh the Insanity!
1. Just the Beginning

**_The Idea for this fic came to me while I was lying awake in bed one night. I told my frinds about it, and they imediatly loved it. BTW, the characters are partly based off me and my two editors. Sora is based off of me, Mira is based off my friend Andi, and Shia is my friend Jo. Yeah...We're insane. _**

**_PS: It might not seem like an FMA fic at first, but don't worry; The beginnign part is just to add to the plot._**

Ready Steady Can't Hold me back…

Ready Steady give me good luck…

Ready Steady never look back…

Let's get started ready steady-

BLEEP

"Stupid alarm…Wake me up at…5 in the morning…I HATE YOU! I WANT YOU TO DIE! I CRUSH PUNY CLOCK!

…

But not today. I'm too tired."

Sora Nimiro slowly opened her eyes and looked around. Her light brown hair was mussed and falling in her face, her blue eyes seemed as if they were that of someone who never saw the light of day. She slowly turned her head, still resting on her pillow, towards the window next to the foot of her bed. No light shone through the closed blinds.

"Why the heck am I even up so early..?" Sora asked herself, staring at the ceiling. At that very moment, a shrill voice was heard through the closed door of Sora's bedroom.

"SORA! I heard that alarm go off; I know you're awake in there! Hurry and get dressed, we need to leave in an hour!" Sora, now fully awake, heard footsteps indicating that whoever it was on the other side of the door had left, so she slowly lifted her head up. She stood clueless for a second, then twitched like a tiny lightbulb had gone off in her head.

"Right! The School trip's today! D'uh!" Sora threw off her covers, jumped up and BANG! Hit her head on a shelf nailed to the wall above her headboard. A large amount of plushies rained down upon her from the shelf, her forehead interrupting their natural balance and causing them to fall on top of her. Sora blinked, then began looking through the pile of plush that had accumulated on her lap, then dug out one with blonde, felt hair and a red felt overcoat. "C'mon, Ed, let's go." Sora grabbed the plush, shoved all the others back up on the shelf, then ran to grab the clothes she had laid out the night before.

You see, today was the day of Sora's annual middle school end-of-the-year trip to Wonderland, a theme park a few cities away from where Sora lived. Since this trip was the only time Sora ever got to go anywhere moderately interesting, this was a very big deal. Moments later, Sora appeared dressed in shorts and a blue tanktop, with a matching backpack (Ed plushie safely secured inside). She grabbed some bread out of the cabinet, then ran outside to get in the car. Sora's mom stared at the door she had just left through.

"We didn't have to leave for another 45 minutes."

Sora sat outside for a few minutes, then walked back inside. "Mom! Are you coming or what!"

"We're not leaving yet."

"Oh. Oops."

**_(Don't worry...The FMA Part is coming:D )_**

An hour and a half later, Sora had arrived at the school, gotten on the bus, and was now nearly 10 minutes away from Wonderland. She had her head pressed against the window, her knees propped up on the seat in front of her, reading a book. The girl sitting next to her had dyed red (almost pink) hair that went down to her chin. She looked over Sora's shoulder and snuck a peek at what she was reading. The book Sora had been staring at was Fullmetal Alchemist Volume 7. Sora wasn't even reading the book; she was staring at a picture.

"Looking at Ed again, are we?" Sora snapped out of her trance and glared at the other girl.

"Mira, shut up. Like you don't do the same thing with your beloved Envy." Mira looked shocked, made a face, then made her comeback.

"Envy's the most awesome and you know it. Ed's a midget."

"DON'T CALL HIM A MIDGET!" Sora reached into her backpack and pulled out the plushie she had put into her backpack that morning. "Don't worry, Ed, she didn't mean it…"

"Actually, I did mean it. He's short. Very very-"

"I said SHUT UP."

"Ha. Make me." The two girls glared at each other enraged, locked in a fangirl rage, when someone sitting behind them piped up.  
"Alright, you two, knock off the fight. You're giving me a headache." The third girl had red-brown hair that went down to about the middle of her back, with black glasses and green eyes.

"Oh, don't you try and stop us, Shia, you get into just as many fangirl catfights as we do."

"Well, yeah, but I usually end up winning. It's because we all already know that Greed's the coolest one out there." The three girls duked it out in verbal fight, until the bus screeched to a stop near the gate of the theme park. Since Shia had been practically leaning into the other chair, and when the bus stopped, her balance was destroyed and she went flying into Sora's lap. "Yeah…We're not speaking of this. Ever." Sora laughed, shoved Shia off of her lap, then ran to the door of the bus, stopping just before running out the door.

"And By the way…ED IS THE COOLEST!"

"IS NOT!" The three friends, laughing and fighting at the same time, ran through the gate of the park. As Mira and Shia ran ahead, Sora stopped. Something had caught her eye, and she wanted to get a closer look. Off in the direction of the restrooms, behind a low brick wall, two figures sat. Sora snuck foreward to get a closer look, but upon seeing them, leapt backwards in fear. The first figure, little taller that the waistline of the other, had blonde hair tied back in a braid. The other, nearly twice as tall as the first, was a suit of armor, the sun shinig off his back.

Somehow, someway...The characters Sora admired so much, Ed and Alphonse Elric,were standing 3 front in front of her! Still somewhat in disbelief, she snuck foreward to see what they were saying.

"So...Any idea where we are?" Ed asked, looking around.

"Uh...I thought you might, brother."

"Well, I don't."

Sora stared at them for a few moments more, trying to convince herself they weren't really there. It wasn't working, so she walkied up casually and spoke.

"Having a bad day, are ya?" Sora said, trying to contain the fangirly exitement flowing through her, fighting the temptation to reach out and cuddle the two like her own life-size plushes.

"Sort of. Where are we?" Alphonse said.

"Uh...You'd better come with me." Sora said nervously, grabbing Ed's arm.

"Uh-WAIT! What're you doing?"

"Just trust, me, ok?"

After Sora had succesfully dragged the two out of sight, she promptly began talking as fast as she could. she pointed at Ed.

"Edward Elric, age 15, State alchemist, Rank: Major. Approxomate height-"

"Hey! How'd you know all that?" Ed asked.

"I'm not finished. Brother is Alphonse Elric. Age 14. Lost his body at an attempt to restore his mother. Ok, now I'm finished."

Ed and Al stared at her in disbelief for a few moments, then spoke up.

"Are you stalking us or something?"

"Wha-NO! Listen, you're characters from a manga series! They sell the books at stors, idiot! Thing is...I have no idea why or how you got here..."

"Where is 'Here'?"

"Uh...Let's see...This might be what you call 'The other side of the Gate'...or...something..."

"How'd we end up here?"

"I don't know, and I'm not gonna try to figure it out, I already have a headache." Sora said meekly, rubbing her temples. Suddenly, as if on cue, a large BANG was heard only a few yards away. The three looked around the corner and saw none other than Riza Hawkeye playing at a corkgun shooting gallery...with an actual gun.

"My God she's gonna kill someone!" Al shouted.

"Hang on, I wanna see this." Sora said, giving Al an evil grin.

Riza had already taken aim then someone working at the stand stopped her from shooting.

"Sorry, Miss, but you can't use a real gun for this game, and you have to pay three bucks to play." Riza took aim at the mans' head. "On second thought...Go ahead and do whatever." Riza shot her gun at one of the stuffed animals suspended from the ceiling, causing it to fall and land in front of the man. She picked it up. "a friend for Black Hayate." she said and walked away.

Meanwhile, Sora, Ed and Al were scared to death.

"we should probably just...Leave her alone for now..." sora studdered.

"I guess so, but if Liutenant Hawkeye's here, don't you get the feeling that EVERYONE ELSE's here too?"

"Oh God, yeah, I do. Meaning all the Homunculi are already trying to kill everyone..."

"Meaning we have to stop them!"

"That's great...I woke up this morning excited about this trip, but now I might die just staying here!"

**_Yay! First chapter's done! Huzzah! Yeah, so basically, Ed, Al and sora are going to be wandering arund the theme park all day running in to all the other FMA characters. I already have scenarios for every character, plus a few bonus chapters, but if you have an idea, I'll be glad to hear them!_**


	2. A Freak and a Security Alarm

**Hiya Everybody! Sorry it took so long to upload this chapter...I have 2 excuses: 1) I was occupied with other things, and 2) I'm lazy. Shut up I know what you're thinking. So anyways, here's chapter 2!**

Ed, Al and Sora walked aimlessly around next to the shooting gallery Hawkeye had just left, large stuffed dog in hand.

"So...We know that the Lieutenant's here, and...we're here, so I think it's safe to assume that everyone's here..." Ed thought aloud, pacing.

"You'd think that," Sora said sarcastically. "So, I think our next objective should be finding everyone who might pose a threat to the tourists," she said, pointing to the small crowd of people just entering through the park gate, wearing Hawaiian shirts, sunglasses, and cameras around their wrists.

"Gee, that really narrows it down," Ed remarked, pointing to a large roller coaster visible over the trees in the distance, where a cart full of people had just gone over the starting hill screaming. "You've got death on wheels here! These...What do you call those things?"

"Those are called 'roller coasters', Ed. Maybe we'll ride one later. Trust me, you'll love it!"

"Then what's that?" Asked Al, pointing to a large circular ride off in the distance.

"That's a Ferris wheel. We'll ride that one too."

"And what about that?"

"That's a souvenir store. You can buy pointless stuff there, like cups and stuff, to remind you of the day. Kinda weird, if you ask me."

"Yeah, it is." Ed said, examining a sign in the shop window that said, 'Souvenir cups, $10'.

"Well, I usually don't get souvenirs, but these shops do have a purpose other than expensive crud."

"And what would that be?" Al asked, perplexed.

"Let's see, it's May, it's 97 degrees out, and these are the only air-conditioned places in the entire park!" Sora said as she floated into the shop.

"Wow...feels good!" Ed said, coming in after Sora. Just as he walked under the fan blowing out into the doorway, Sora stared at him and froze.

"Ed, don't move!"

"What? What is it?"

"Your hair, it's-"

"Is there a spider in my hair! AAUGH! SPIDER!" Ed flailed his hands through his hair, as if shaking off a spider.

"No, there's no spider, your hair's blowing!"

Ed stopped flailing. "Say what?"

"The way your hair is blowing...It makes you look like a model!"

"Seriously?" Ed stuck a sexy pose, his hair still blowing. Al stared.

"Yeah...Awkward. Ed, I think you should stop now. You're scaring everyone," Al said, pointing to the other customers inside the store.

"...Oh..." Ed stood up straight and walked through the door. Just as he took another step forward, an alarm set off. "Now what!"

Two security guards ran up to him, and grabbed his arm. "Sorry, kid, but this is for safety measures. We gotta search you."

"Oh, that's nice. You want me to take off all my clothes, is that it!"

"Ed, that's not what they're-"

"Ok, fine. But just to let you know, I don't think you two are doing your job very well. I mean, come on, take off my clothes in front of everyone! My God, you guys are perverts!"

"Get the nightstick, this guy's nuts!"

"What's a nightstick?"

"Ed, RUN YOU IDIOT!" Sora yelled. Ed turned and started to run, but the guards grabbed the hood of his coat. Just as they started dragging him into the store, Sora ran over and grabbed one guard's arm. "Wait! You can't take him! He's my...cousin!" She said, in a desperate attempt to keep Ed from getting taken in by the law.

"Cousin?" the two guards said simultaneously. "Seriously?"

""Uh...Yeah!" Al said, finally realizing what Sora was up to.

"Uh…Yeah! But…He's from… Switzerland, so he…doesn't…Speak English well…"

"He sounded pretty fluent to me."

"Uh…Well…That…He…uh…Picked it up on TV! He probably doesn't even know what he's saying! Right, Ed?" Sora said, pounding Ed on the back, as if begging him to go along with her charade. However, she pounded him a little too hard, and he lost balance and fell.

"What the heck are you-"

Sora bent down and gritted her teeth. "Play along and they won't try to kill you!" She whispered through her teeth.

"Oohh….I get it!" Ed realized. "…What does Switzerlandish sound like?"

"Just…Don't do anything stupid, OK?" Sora whispered as she rose from the floor. _We're all gonna die. Someone kill me now._ Sora thought as she turned to face the two officers. As Ed rose from the floor, she turned toward him and began their impromptu Switzerlandish (As Ed called it) conversation.

"Ed, uh...Mica asko schnitzel woargen?"

„Uh...Mica shnitzel haskao...pleshko."

Sora stared at Ed for a moment, then turned back to the guards. "He says he picked it up. Too much TV for the little shrimp," she said, then realized what she had said. She turned around slowly to see Ed, veins popping in his forehead, looking ready to pounce. Sora began sweating as one of the guards spoke up.

"What's wrong with the little guy?"

"WHO'RE YOU CALLING A SHRIMP SO SMALL HE COULD GET PICKED UP BY A HUMMINGBIRD!"

"This little guy's nuts!"

"I AM NOT LITTLE!"

"We're in trouble now! Al!"

"Yeah?"

"Grab your brother and let's go!"

"Ok…" Al reached over and grabbed Ed around his neck, gragging him away before he could do any serious damage to the guards, then took off following Sora. As Al ran, he glanced behind him, then noticed the police guards were following them.

"Uh, Sora, we might have a problem..."

Sora, still clinging to Ed's arm and dragging him along, looked back to see the guards right on their tail.

"Shoot. We've gotta lose them somehow…Oh!" Sora ran over to a covered stage entrance. "Al! Over here!"

"Ok!" Sora and Al (Still carrying Ed under his arm) ducked into the arena, ran to the center of the large crowd gathered in the center and ducked out of sight. Sora ran over to the edge to make sure the cops didn't follow them inside. She looked out the doorway and saw the two standing outside the door. She froze. From where she was standing, she could just barely make out their conversation.

"Where'd they go?"

"You're asking me? I thought you said you saw which way they went!"

"Forget it. Let's keep looking." The two cops ran out of Sora's view, but it didn't seem like she knew where they were. Sora, feeling relieved, worked her way into the center of the crowd to find Ed and Al. When she found them, they were staring off in the distance.

"Hey guys, I'm back. What'd I miss?" The two continued to stare straight ahead. "Uh…Guys? Helloooooo?" She waved her head in front of Ed's face. No response. She waved her hand in front of Al's face. Still no response. She hated being ignored, and turned toward what they were looking at.

"I really don't get what could be more interesting than….Oh….My….GOD! THAT'S AWESOME!" Sora had caught eye on what they were staring at so intently. It turned out they had walked into the outdoor freakshow tent, and the star of the show…..Was Scar. Wearing dark purple spandex. His wrists and ankles were bound in chains, as if the people running the show didn't want to die. Apparently the Ringmaster had figured out how to make Scar do what he said.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you…Atomic Man!"

"'Atomic Man'?" Sora, Ed and Al all said together. The audience burst into applause, but the trio remained unfazed.

"We should do something for him. I don't like the way they treat Scar like a freak…It's inhumane," Sora said, looking at Scar sympathetically.

"I don't care as long as he's not trying to kill anyone." Ed said, turning to walk away.

"And now, I'll need a volunteer from the audience to help me demonstrate this man's abilities." The ringmaster scanned the audience, then pointed to Ed. "You there, the short one! Wanna try it?"

Ed snapped. "DON'T CALL ME SMALL!" Immediately after the ringmaster pointed Ed out, Scar started struggling. Noticing this, the ringmaster turned to Scar.

"Quit resisting," he said, taking out a whip and hitting Scar on the back. All of Scar's fury was now focused on the ringmaster. "In the name of Ishbala…"

"Ah!" Sora, seeing this, whispered something to Al. Al promptly began drawing a circle on the ground.

"You sure this'll work?"

"Sure it will! Trust me; this'll be a lot funnier than that outfit he's wearing." Sora stared at Scar for a moment, as if contemplating his next move. "And…NOW!" Sora yelled to Al, and sparks began flying from the floor. Back up on stage, something started happening. The shackles on Scar's hands and feet snapped in half. Since Scar was ignoring Ed, he turned to the ringmaster.

"Hehe…Oh. Uh….No hard feelings, right?" The ringmasters' negotiations didn't work. It was too late for that. The ringmaster bolted. "I don't want to die!" he screamed as Scar took after him. Suddenly, Ed popped up right behind Scar.

"YOU'LL PAY FOR CALLING ME SHORT!" he yelled, as if he wanted to kill the ringmaster himself. Sora grabbed the hood of his coat.

"Don't worry, Scar'll take care of that. Besides, once he's done with the ringmaster, if you're standing there, he might try to kill you too."

"Eh, good point. Sora, you know where they sell cameras? I wanna take a picture of that jerk's face right when Scar catches him-HEY! Let go!"

Sora had grabbed Ed's braid and was tugging him in the opposite direction. "Now's not the time, Ed. We've got work to do."

"Damn."

**WHOOHOO! Finally done! Everyone I know has been pestering me to finish this chapter. Ok, Done, HAPPY! I thought so. Anyways, just so you know, the 'Sexy Model' thing actually happened between me and my friend Matt. It was awesome. I couldn't resist. **

**PREVIEW FOR THE NEXT CHAPTER: **

"We're destroying the Laws of Physics and I like it!"

**What could this mean…? Find out in the Next chapter! **


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